On Christmas Day one year we took our son, Alex, out to IHOP
for dinner. No one felt like cooking and it was nice to focus on the family
instead of making the perfect meal. The restaurant was packed, of course, as we
weren’t the only ones who had had this idea, and our waitress was busy. We were
quite happy with her, however, as she was attentive and friendly despite the
fact that she had to work on a holiday and was obviously running from table to
table trying to keep everyone happy.
When we were getting to leave Alex told her, “God bless you.”
Tears came to her eyes and she tried to desperately blink
them away. We asked her what was wrong,
and as most people do, she tried to make light of it. Without going into great
detail she told us that she had had several extremely difficult customers
earlier that day who weren’t so nice to her, and she really appreciated the
kind words.
We came away from our dinner feeling a little saddened by
the thought that people who are supposed to be celebrating Christmas, a holiday
known for goodwill and love, were instead spreading anger and hurt feelings to
those who are giving up their own holiday to provide us with a pleasant dining
experience.
Whatever happened to good old-fashioned kindness? When did
it become okay to be rude to not only strangers, but our closest friends and
family as well? At what point does a person’s need to vent their frustration
become a priority over the feelings and emotions of those around them?
And this isn’t an isolated case. You can see this every day.
Just look at today’s top headlines and it’s obvious that most of the problems
boil down to a simple case of just plain old not being nice. We are encouraged
to “express our feelings”, but unfortunately what people don’t realize is that
the freedom to express our feelings quite often can hurt other people. And what’s
worse is that most of us don’t even think about it. It’s almost become normal
to be rude.
And this isn’t limited to just those outside the Church.
Over the years I’ve seen people who profess to love God
treat people with the same rude behavior our poor waitress had to deal with. I’ve
even seen worse. And at times, I must confess, I have been just as guilty. Rude behavior and unkind words are so much
easier to slip into that at times I don’t even realize I’m doing it, and by the
time I come to my senses the damage has already been done.
I am not always a non-grumpy person. I struggle with being
nice, and kindness quite often sounds like a foreign word. But as a Christian,
a Christ-follower, I have to work at being different than the world. To truly
follow Christ I have to make a conscious effort to use my words to bless
others, to show them Christ’s love by being kind and loving to them, to treat
them as Jesus would treat me.
It’s not easy being kind, it means that I have to put my own
emotions and feelings aside and put someone else’s first. Being kind means that
my bad day doesn’t give me the right to make someone else’s day just as bad, or
worse. Being kind means that I have to stop before I speak, I have to hesitate
before I act, and most importantly, I need to pray for God’s wisdom and
strength so that the people I love will see Him, not me.
After all, being kind is the nice thing to do, and if I can’t
be nice then am I really following Christ?
