Being Kind is the Nice Thing to Do

On Christmas Day one year we took our son, Alex, out to IHOP for dinner. No one felt like cooking and it was nice to focus on the family instead of making the perfect meal. The restaurant was packed, of course, as we weren’t the only ones who had had this idea, and our waitress was busy. We were quite happy with her, however, as she was attentive and friendly despite the fact that she had to work on a holiday and was obviously running from table to table trying to keep everyone happy.

When we were getting to leave Alex told her, “God bless you.”

Tears came to her eyes and she tried to desperately blink them away.  We asked her what was wrong, and as most people do, she tried to make light of it. Without going into great detail she told us that she had had several extremely difficult customers earlier that day who weren’t so nice to her, and she really appreciated the kind words.

We came away from our dinner feeling a little saddened by the thought that people who are supposed to be celebrating Christmas, a holiday known for goodwill and love, were instead spreading anger and hurt feelings to those who are giving up their own holiday to provide us with a pleasant dining experience.

Whatever happened to good old-fashioned kindness? When did it become okay to be rude to not only strangers, but our closest friends and family as well? At what point does a person’s need to vent their frustration become a priority over the feelings and emotions of those around them?

And this isn’t an isolated case. You can see this every day. Just look at today’s top headlines and it’s obvious that most of the problems boil down to a simple case of just plain old not being nice. We are encouraged to “express our feelings”, but unfortunately what people don’t realize is that the freedom to express our feelings quite often can hurt other people. And what’s worse is that most of us don’t even think about it. It’s almost become normal to be rude.

And this isn’t limited to just those outside the Church.

Over the years I’ve seen people who profess to love God treat people with the same rude behavior our poor waitress had to deal with. I’ve even seen worse. And at times, I must confess, I have been just as guilty.  Rude behavior and unkind words are so much easier to slip into that at times I don’t even realize I’m doing it, and by the time I come to my senses the damage has already been done.

I am not always a non-grumpy person. I struggle with being nice, and kindness quite often sounds like a foreign word. But as a Christian, a Christ-follower, I have to work at being different than the world. To truly follow Christ I have to make a conscious effort to use my words to bless others, to show them Christ’s love by being kind and loving to them, to treat them as Jesus would treat me.

It’s not easy being kind, it means that I have to put my own emotions and feelings aside and put someone else’s first. Being kind means that my bad day doesn’t give me the right to make someone else’s day just as bad, or worse. Being kind means that I have to stop before I speak, I have to hesitate before I act, and most importantly, I need to pray for God’s wisdom and strength so that the people I love will see Him, not me.

After all, being kind is the nice thing to do, and if I can’t be nice then am I really following Christ?